I cannot overemphasize the importance of Peter Rollins’ How (Not) to Speak of God in my spiritual journey. After nearly three decades of orthodoxy, I went through several years of dark nights of the soul. Though reluctant to leave behind a faith and relationship that had been the centerpiece of my life, I could no longer wave off doctrinal inconsistencies with the wand of faith nor accept the unbending certainty and dogmatism of what I knew to be Christianity. I could see only a binary, mutually exclusive decision before me: turn off my brain and return to a lobotomized Christianity or accept, sadly, the reason and logic that were leading me toward agnosticism. Rollins showed me that there is a way of embracing my faith while maintaining personal and intellectual integrity. Though this book contains many, many ideas that could challenge the reader, below are the two key themes for which I am most grateful. If you are going to start the journey of a postmodern rethinking of our modern Christianity, I suggest you start here with this book.
Doubt. Faith is widely understood to be an unwavering confidence in the factual accuracy of a doctrinal system. By this definition, a person of faith is one who possesses a clearly defined set of beliefs to which they cling tenaciously. From this perspective, doubt and questions are enemies of faith that must be resisted at every turn. Against this view, Rollins suggests that “only a genuine faith can embrace doubt” (36). Instead of being an enemy of faith, doubt is actually an essential ingredient of true faith. When we ‘know’ our religious doctrines with ‘certainty’, then faith is unnecessary. But faith is truly faith when there are no guarantees, when we see but dim shadows and blurry visions, when life and God shift in ways unexpected and unexplained...and yet we still stumble forward in love and trust, hope and courage. Because of our need to be in control of everything in our lives, an honest look at the raw uncertainty of life and religion can be unsettling, even terrifying. But embracing this uncertainty allows us to more authentically follow in the steps of the fishermen who left their nets, the disciples who sat in devastated silence through the long Sabbath following ‘Good’ Friday, and the Son of God who cried out in pain and betrayal from the cross. Embrace your uncertainty, celebrate your doubts, ask your questions, and live the adventure of faith.
Idolatry. We normally reserve the label ‘idol’ for Hindu statues or maybe other people's sins (or their houses and toys that we cannot afford). However, Rollins (and many other postmodern Christians) very cleverly throws the sin of idolatry right back in the Church’s lap. In the traditional view, an idol is a physical representation of God, that by its very createdness, is inadequate and inaccurate. Though most of us do not worship a physical representation of God, if we hold too tightly to our doctrines and intellectual ‘images’ of God, then we also commit idolatry. If we do not make the distinction between God-as-He-really-is and God-as-we-understand-Him, then we are probably worshipping a god of our own creation. Rollins suggests, “describe your God and you will discover yourself” (42). Now, the point here is not to despair that our doctrines are inaccurate, but to “embrace the idea that we all get God wrong” (70). This does not mean that we reject our doctrines and traditions and sadly turn away from theology as a hopeless endeavor, but simply that we value our belief systems as human (and therefore limited) responses and interpretations of God-experiences rather than ultimate, complete, perfected Truth. “Speaking of God is never speaking of God but only ever speaking about our understanding of God” (34). Or, put another way, “the relationship we have with God cannot be reduced to our understanding of that relationship” (21). Our beliefs are important, but they are not ultimate. Viewing our doctrines as provisional and temporary opens up opportunities to learn from other people, unfamiliar traditions, and unexpected God-experiences.
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